The steps

A few years ago, I was living in my parents basement with my kids. At the time all of us were extremely raw and emotional, but i did my best to always be there for my kids and help them with whatever they needed. This was difficult at times because they became very demanding, and on one such occasion we were walking down the basement steps. Both my kids were whining at me.
"Pick me up!" They cried.
I told them I couldn't safely carry both of them down the stairs. I had to hold the railing for safety sake, and since neither would relinquish their claim to my arm neither would be carried. Still they pleaded and begged and grabbed at my legs. My son was irate I was holding my daughter's hand, and not his.
"Let's all just hold the railing." I ordered a quarter of the way down the stairs.
My daughter being only a toddler, at the time, instead decided to jump up and down next to the open side of the stairs Mommy instincts took over and I scooped her up with my left arm, but her jumping antics did not stop. She refused to hold onto me and instead bounced and flailed like a fish on land. Meanwhile Elisha's fury overloaded and tears burst from his eyes as he sat on the steps at my feet blocking my path, and tripping me up.
"Get up!" I shouted. "You'll make me fall! My daughter hold onto me I can't hold you like this!"
My son moved farther down the steps weeping and wailing the whole way. My daughter would hold on for no more than a few seconds before I needed to remind her yet again, with each reminder my son would beg to be held too.
"You don't love me!' He sobbed once again sitting at my feet grabbing at my leg.
At this point I began to cry, and I pleaded.
"Children I'm so tired. Please be good. I'm going to get hurt if you keep doing this. Please hold onto me. Please hold the railing. I love you all very much but please-"
I managed a few more steps before my son tripped me up again. Now both of them were screaming and shouting so loud I couldn't hear or feel anything, but distress. My son grabbed my right arm nearly pulling me over. Picking him up seemed like my only option and with so few steps left I could manage, so long as they stopped  screaming and flailing, and I informed them as much when I placed my son in my right arm.
"You need to stop flailing and screaming. Be good to your Mama!"
I took one step, with the two wild things being relatively calm. I could do it, and this nightmare would be over soon, but the easy step brought confidence to my kids. They both began to bounce and scream and cheer, because being held by Mom is a great place to start a chicken fight right? My strength was failing me emotional and physical exhaustion was taking its toll. If I dropped my kids I could keep my balance, but what would happen to them? Maybe just my son? Impossible, he unlike my daughter gripped onto me like a weighty boa constrictor. I just had to keep balanced and either sit down or get down the stairs safely. Above all, I didn't want my kids to get hurt.
"Be good to Mama! Be still So I can sit down." I pleaded.
They erupted with laughter. My daughter held out her arms like Hallelujah, and my son shook me like a rag doll. That was it. That was the moment I had nightmares about come true. I fell forward through the air and down. My feet must of hit the last two steps before pushing me outward onto the cold cement floor. I never let go of the kids. They didn't stop laughing. I had landed on my crumpled legs. My kids cheered. I cried.
"Are you alright? Are you alright?" I asked both of them.
They were fine except bewildered frowns went across their faces.
"Why are you crying Mama?" Asked my son.
I explained that falling down the steps hurts. They in turn responded skeptically. After all they had fallen and no such pain happened for them. So off they went on their merry way. Meanwhile, I couldn't stand, and instead sat in my pain. Nothing was broken, but I had a hard time untwisting my legs. Tears streamed down my face. Eventually my children acknowledged I must actually be in pain since I didn't immediately respond to their demands to alight the basement room. Still the reality didn't sink in for them until they saw my shins in the morning light. Black, blue and purple from my knee nearly all the way down, and on one foot as well. It didn't go away in a day or two, but for good long weeks there were remnants. From that day on, my children held onto the railing.

Son Lux collaboration through hearing: The Art Assignment

The Toby Curse

It seems to me that people named Toby are cursed, within the realm of fiction. It is the same for any spelling variation. They simply have it bad. Is there a running joke among writers to doom people named Toby?
Consider America's The Office (2005- 2013). Spoiler Alert. The last episode everyone is seen to have a somewhat happy ending except for Toby. It is bad enough he consistently suffers throughout the show, but in the end he's even worse off! Funny? No. Then again I didn't realize he was cursed by his name.
Toby Wyatt Flenderson 


Romy and Michele's High School Reunion (1997) One of the funniest reunion comedies out there. Funny like the office and therefore it suffers from the Toby curse. In this female lead comedy the Toby is female. She mistreated throughout the film by a character named Heather Mooney. Played superbly and foul mouthed by Janeane Garofalo. Although this Toby does get her year book signed as her better ending. Far from happy though.
Toby Walters


Arrested Development (2003-) has likely more than one curse on the repeatedly canceled show. One of those curses is the Toby curse, or in this case the Tobias curse. Tobias has nothing but bad luck. Worse luck than the other members of the dysfunctional family. True he hasn't lost his hand or gone to jail, but every word he speaks betrays him. That's a 24/7 curse that can only be explained by one mean writers and two maybe just maybe the Toby curse.
Tobias Funke


Gravity Falls (2012-) is an animated show dedicated to the mysteries of the town Gravity Falls. One mystery they have is, you guessed it, the Toby curse. Their Toby is a sad pathetic man who serves as running joke of sadness. If only he knew to change his name,
Toby Determined


It is not even safe overseas. The anime Naruto: Shippuden (2007-) has its own tormented Tobi. I'll not get into plot details but this Tobi is seriously cursed. He has the misfortune to change his name to Tobi. That sealed his fate.
Obito "Tobi" Uchiha


What caused this curse to happen? Surely, this wasn't always the case in TV and cinema? No, I think something caused the curse. Someone with power. Someone with skill. Someone with great singing ability, and their own kingdom of goblins.


Labyrinth (1986) the forefather of the Toby curse. I think that future aspiring writers saw this Jim Henson film and decided all those named "Toby" must have bad luck. Perhaps it didn't' influence Naruto, but the rest I actually think it is a possibility. The poor baby boy named Toby kidnaped by the Goblin King as played by David Bowie. That's the source of the curse. We need Jennifer Connelly to be Sarah and set this right.


Can you think of any other bad luck people named Toby under the curse of David Bowie? Let me know.